It is a good place, a beautiful place, here beyond the wall of human consciousness. It’s a place where I could easily see myself spending eternity, if eternity chose to accept me.
But I’m not there yet.
When I was first approached, I thought myself chosen by some great and perhaps even all-knowing Higher Power for this calling. Hardly anyone, after all, ever even gets to see a Unicorn, let alone approach her, and nowadays there are even taboos about touching one. Thank goodness.
But I was… moved. Incredulous. It wasn’t just emotional, though of course I was overwhelmed, I was ecstatic! But I couldn’t believe it, either. Such things do not exist for us–or, rather, for them–out there in the Supposedly. So I didn’t believe my eyes.
At first, I only wanted to touch the horse, but soon I remembered that I’d seen horses aplenty, even living where I did, and had touched them before. So I looked at the horn, there, springing out of her skull like a fingernail, a misplaced fifth hoof, wreathed in a scabby areola of hardened skin.
But it couldn’t be real. Could it? It had to be, well, a trick. Of some sort. Attached? Adapted? A tumor, perhaps? So I touched it. And, well… the rest is history.
The last thirty years, living on the cusp as I do, being one of the few human beings—if human I can still be called—able to move back and forth from that world into this, from our world—their world—into yours, that’s changed my perception. I can’t pretend anymore that I know what’s real and what isn’t; after all, I touched a Unicorn!
Can you imagine how crazy that sounds out there? I touched a Unicorn and turned into a Centaur. Those are terms you don’t use outside fairly tales and metaphors. Not if you’re human. So it really is like I’m living in a dream. Still. After all this time.
Don’t you understand why I can’t stay? Why I can’t settle for the dream? I touched the horn of a Unicorn and… it wasn’t what I expected. If I go all the way, if I give up my Soul entirely, it won’t just be the end of my world for me, it won’t just be like I’ll die, like I’ll never wake up from this dream.
I will have become the Unicorn, and there’ll be nothing left for me to wonder.